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Dave Gallagher was struggling.
He had lost his brother, sister and uncle, and everything was getting on top of him. He would tell his wife he was going out to the shops, but would just sit in his car and cry. He was thinking of taking his own life.
So one day, speaking to his brother, he made the decision to 'sort his head out'. "I’d made this mask and that’s what people do. They make a mask,” he said.
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A chat with his GP and then counselling followed and Dave was on the first step of his journey. He went home and told his family how he was feeling, and when wife Barbara saw a news feature about Andy's Man Club, Dave headed to a session - but once he got there, he simply walked past.
It wasn't until Andy's Man Club opened a session at Manchester City's Etihad Stadium that Dave decided to give it another shot.
"I drove into the car park and I was sat there," the lifelong City fan said. "I’m looking at the ground, I think it’s a beautiful ground, I love the ground. Loved Maine Road but this is just something else. Every time I drive past, I get like this feeling of like where we were, where we was and where we are now.
“Anyway, I was just about to turn me engine on and drive away – and then there was a knock on my window. I put the window down and he said, 'have you come to Andy’s Man Club?'. He said, 'come with me brother' and he called me brother.
"I thought, 'ok, he’s caught me, I can’t run away now'. I walked down to the door. Everybody there greeted me, hugged me and shook me hand. The coffee was there, these guys, people chatting, the seats were in a circle. He explained about the talking ball and I thought, I don’t think this is for me!
“However, I suddenly just started going on and I didn’t stop. I kept looking around, looking for smirks or you know, judgement? No one was. I got everything off my chest. After the session ended, I went home and the wife said to me: ‘how was it?’. I said: 'eye opening – eye-opening. Fantastic.'”
Dave is now a regular attendee at Andy's Man Club at the Etihad and is sharing his story to try and help just one person who may be struggling.
He has also been able to return to City games, having stepped away from his season ticket of 30 years due to his health. The recent Champions League clash with Inter Milan was his first step back inside the Etihad in years.
“Now, that game was the first game I’ve been to in a long while," he explains. “Barbara had said ahead of the game: ‘how are you going to be with the crowds and stuff like that?’. I truly enjoyed it. It just brought back so many memories. I was talking to the lads saying, I started over there, moved over there, we used to go up there, drink there.
"It was bringing up all these fond memories that I’d forgot all about. If it wasn’t for Andy’s Man Club, I probably would never have gone to another game.”
Dave is keen to share his experiences, in the hope that other men will feel comfortable to attend Andy's Man Club Sessions if they need help. The charity says there have been 402 individual sessions at the Etihad over the last six months.
"Its free – that’s the first kicker. Then, I say, it’s at City," Dave explains. “And no one judges you. No one judges you. And what you think is unique, your problems, when you listen to everybody else’s problems, some people have less, some people have more, some people have exactly the same but everybody knows what you’re going through.
"Everyone in that room knows what you’re going through to some degree. And nobody judges you, nobody laughs at you, nobody calls you anything. There’s a saying ‘to know a man, you need to walk a mile in his shoes.’ It sounds corny but when you’re at Andy’s Man Club, you feel that all these men have walked a mile in your shoes, and you’ve walked a mile in theirs – because you understand exactly when they’re talking about.
“What you think is unique, your problems, when you listen to everybody else’s problems, some people have less, some people have more, some people have exactly the same, but everybody knows what you’re going through.
"Since I’ve been coming to Andy’s Man Club, people just say 'Dave – you’re a different man'. Before, I lost me love for everything.
“My wife says, I understand more because you talk to me now. I’ve got used to talking and letting it all go. Since coming to Andy’s Man Club, I really talk more to people. It did me the world of good. It still is. I look forward to coming.
“I’ve learnt to start talking. Maybe it’s a safety lock that we have when we’ve got depression. We’re frightened of being judged and if you tell people something you say – I can’t say that to them. It builds up your confidence to talk. When they say (Andy’s Man Club), it's good to talk – it is! It really is. When you’ve come here and you chat chat chat, then when I go home – I can talk.
Andy's Man Club sessions take place at the Etihad Stadium every Monday between 7pm-9pm. The sessions are free, with no pre-registering or identification required, and there is no pressure to speak at any session.